I want to indulge my lighter side as well as my more shallow side and say this:
Guys, I fuckin' love commercials.
Yesterday, I had a brief conversation with a friend of mine. I had told him a while back about the new ad campaign by Wendy's with a redheaded girl who I thought was, quite honestly, very pretty.
Now I hate commercials with girls eating things in slow-motion. Or at any speed. In general, I hate commercials where they try to make the girl look sexy. I want everyone in commercials to just look like normal people. I think that helps me relate to the world of the commercial, whatever it may be. If it's about this girl, I just want her to be cute and for the most part, NORMAL. Like I said, I'm gonna be sorta superficial right now and talk about 4 Pretty Girls From Commercials.
THESE FOUR ARE COOL. (Click their pictures to watch the commercial.)
Girl: NATALIE GOLD
What I think her name is based on the commercial: Oh yeah, definitely Natalie. Every Natalie is tragically awkward.
Advertising: Something called KRAFT Milk Bites.
What I keep thinking it's advertising: The beer she's not drinking looks way more delicious than the milk bite.
Would I date the girl: She's very cute, I'd say maybe. Except I'm not dating another Natalie.
Would I buy the product: While I actually find it quite funny, I don't know what a milk bite is, but that sounds like pure, unadulterated witchcraft.
Girl: ARIELLE VANDENBERG
What I think her name is based on the commercial: Something like Brittany. Or Courtney. Something with the 'ee' sound at the end but done with a -y or -ey.
Advertising: Garnier Color Foam. (THE COLORS DUKE. THE COLORS!!!)
What I keep thinking it's advertising: 30 Rock
Would I date the girl: She's way bubbly in this commercial, but the hair is awesome. I say yes. But I sure hope she doesn't mind me cutting her off in real life as much as Tina Fey does in the commercial.
Would I buy the product: While I admit to using Herbal Essences in the past (IT FEELS GOOD ON MY SENSITIVE SCALP), I wouldn't use color foam, so technically, no? ...There goes the one thing Arielle and I would be able to talk about.
Girl: INGRID HAAS
What I think her name is based on the commercial: Certainly not Ingrid. But I guess something weird like that. Leanna.
Advertising: The largest 4G Network in the world, AT&T.
What I Keep Thinking It's Advertising: The worst radio station in the world.
Would I date the girl: She's legitimately funny in this commercial. The guy doesn't seem to have much going for him though. So he can if he wants to. When you watch this commercial on YouTube, all the comments compare her look to a pornstar. I'm not ashamed to say I know exactly who the pornstar is, and I think everyone should know her, if only for one reason: SHE EFFIN' CRAY.
Would I buy the product: Well, I already have it. I have no way of knowing if it's the largest 4G network or not. I'm not the scientist who can prove that.
Girl: Morgan Smith Goodwin
What I think her name is based on the commercial: Wendy
What I Keep Thinking It's Advertising: Wendy's, god damn it! Damn you, survey that I wrote!
Would I date the girl: Absolutely. Best thing? She seems to only be around when people are hungry, AND she doesn't mind fast food apparently.
Would I buy the product: Actually, no. I can't think of the last time or the next time I had or will have Wendy's.